I’ve got a lot of things on my mind most of the time

I don’t think I’m ever really at peace with myself, with the world, with anything right now

I don’t have anyone to talk about some stuff with

Some of the personal stuff that is sort of eating me up

But I don’t have an outlet for, at the moment

Friday night when I got home, I plugged in my guitar, like many other nights

And the frustration just all came out

It was not music

It was just me acting frustrated making godawful noises

It kind of frightened me

I can usually put something together on guitar that sounds reasonably nice

This wasn’t that, this was just noise completely disordered noises

I put the guitar down, haven’t yet picked it back up

I need to clear my head

But I don’t know how

I can’t write it down

I can’t talk with any body

I don’t know why people tell me secrets

Why me?

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