The Slag Heap Of Life

I sort of hate to always be talkin’ about facebook. But in this day and age, that’s where we share our lives. No idea what the future will look like, but that seems to be where we are now.

Most of what I see on facebook is people sharing their lives having children and grand children, and all of that. I have to admit, as a single, childless man, that’s sort of hittin’ a nerve, every now and then. We just don’t count for that much. Not sayin’ life is supposed to be fair, or this or that. Just sayin’. If you don’t have a trophy by the time you reach a certain age, you’re just payin’ taxes to build schools for other people. You’re sort of in a nowhere zone, where nothing much good is gonna ever happen for you You’re a worker bee, a drone. You don’t actually get to have sex with the queen, you just work to provide for the colony that is somehow keeping you alive.

I don’t know, I just write the crazy stuff that goes through my head every now and then. I don’t think about it before writing it. Maybe I’ll feel differently tomorrow.

Update:

You know, this is a fairly dark state of mind I go into every now and then, but I thought I should add something to maybe show another side of it.

Today I went out to North Collier Regional Park. It is a huge complex, and it was packed. There were tons of kids playing at the water park. I thought about my comment on taxes. That place cost a lot of money, but it was mostly the parents who have kids to keep entertained paying those taxes. My part in paying for that complex is insignificantly small. And besides, I was out using it, too, remember? That wouldn’t have been possible without all of those parents chipping in to say, “Hey, we need a park.”

Yesterday I was out checking out another new, expensive looking park, Gordon River Greenway. I walked to the end of the park, and outside of the entrance into a subdivision. There was a couple with 2 young kids riding bikes from the subdivision to the park. They were riding about the same pace I was walking, so as I walked along with them, it struck me how little I understand the lives of a married couple with two young kids, and that I did not know how to view life through that lens. That park was perfect for their purposes, and, well, there I was, out enjoying something that was probably built more for people like them than it was for people like me. So, I guess I’m always learning, or at least trying to.But yes, sometimes the darker feelings of self-pity or whatever come through. So, hopefully as I learn to see more, there will be less and less of them.

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